What I know for sure….

... that losing my temper always ends up hurting me just as much as the person whom I made the target of my wrath and fury. Which I suppose is rather fitting in a way and a good example of karma.

In the past two weeks, I’ve blown up at both a relative and a good friend. In retrospect, both temper tantrums were avoidable and completely unnecessary. I’ve apologized to both, but really, I don’t feel much better. I doubt they do either.

As my mother would likely say “I’ve resolved to change my thinking on this...I’ll put together some affirmations" (love The Mom). From what I’ve gleaned from that wonderful all-knowing source (the Internet, natch), I’ve put together the following affirmations which I resolve to repeat in my head whenever I feel The Rage:

1. Call a time out with myself whenever I feel my temper building.

2. Try deep breathing - breathe in through my nose for eight seconds, and out through my mouth for sixteen seconds. Repeat several times. Resolve not to care when people start looking at me funny.

3. Change my thoughts. "I'll show him!" becomes "What will best help me right now?" "He always does this to me," becomes "I'm the only one who can make a fool out of me." You got that right sister.

4. Try to think about how hurt someone could be by my words. Nothing’s worth causing unnecessary hurt to someone else – especially someone you care about.

Sorry Uncle George.

Sorry Joe.

a brief history

I stole this from a blogger who stole it from a blogger, who stole...well, you get the idea:

10 years ago:

I was 19.
I had just graduated high school.
I had been accepted into George Brown’s chef program but decided not to go for lack of funds.
I then started a job with a company that I would stay with for eight years.

5 years ago:

I was 24.
I was in a relationship with the man I would eventually marry, whee!
I had started taking courses towards a certificate program at Ryerson University.
I had lost about 50 pounds.

3 years ago:

I was 26.
I had been married for less than a year.
I was living in a house I bought with my husband.
I was still working at the same company and getting more and more stressed about it.

1 year ago:

I was 28.
I had learned that this marriage thing was pretty cool.
I had travelled to Costa Rica with my husband and decided that hot, humid climates weren’t my vacation destination of choice.
I started taking courses towards a degree program at York University.

Today:

I am 29.
I finally left my first employer and am pretty happy in a new position.
I am planning a trip to Europe with my husband for the fall. Whee hee!
I’ve learned that family is so important , that compassion is necessary and that love is the answer to almost every question.